Show Up Uncut
Welcome to "Show Up Uncut," a podcast where two fierce ladies bring you unfiltered conversations on business, health, fitness, and mindset.
Join us for an unapologetic exploration of the highs, lows, and everything in between as we share raw, real-life stories from the trenches of SHOWING UP. From crushing goals in business to smashing personal best at the gym, we're here to inspire and empower you to show up fully in every aspect of your life. Get ready for straight talk, bold insights, and unwavering authenticity as we dive deep into what it takes to succeed in business and beyond. Tune in and get ready to elevate your game with "Show Up Uncut"!
Show Up Uncut
Dont Be a Cunt: The Ripple Effect of Kindness
Ever been surprised by a small act of kindness that completely changed your day? Join us on Show Up Uncut as we share heartfelt stories of simple gestures that brought joy and smiles, from receiving a surprise coffee to the power of a friendly smile at a stranger. We'll talk about why these moments matter and how a positive demeanor can ripple through our daily interactions, making each day a bit smoother and more pleasant for everyone involved.
Next, step into the world of gym culture with us! We chat about the camaraderie of recognizing familiar faces, the significance of welcoming newcomers, and the unique challenges introverts face in social settings. Discover the stark contrast between online personas and real-life behavior as we promote the importance of genuine, authentic connections both online and offline. We'll share our experiences and tips for overcoming social anxieties and fostering a more inclusive environment, especially for women who may feel intimidated.
Finally, we address the sometimes tricky balance of self-centeredness and supportiveness in our relationships. Through personal anecdotes, we highlight the impact of authenticity, the importance of setting firm boundaries in professional settings, and the influence of social media on our self-esteem. We also offer practical advice on curating a positive online environment and being kind to oneself. And for a bit of fun, we wrap up with a candid, light-hearted conversation about our unscripted, casual podcast style and tease the exciting stories to come. Join us for an episode filled with laughter, insights, and real talk that promises to entertain and inspire.
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Welcome back to another episode Ebi Ep of Show Up Uncut with.
Speaker 2:Em and Jess.
Speaker 1:Oh, I love how we have a little giggle every time.
Speaker 2:It'll never get old. No.
Speaker 1:So today we're talking about how to not be a cunt, basically. I'm sure we'll all love a little bit of that.
Speaker 2:So yes, we're basically wanting to talk about kindness and Emp respect and respect r-e-s-b-e-c-t find out what it means to me.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, that could be the theme song. Oh my god, oh my god. We'll put that in the intro.
Speaker 1:No, not really, um yeah, with like being, um, being kind, that's basically what we're we're touching on and like how many times have you been in a situation where, like, someone's just been a fucking asshole, like it could even be as simple, simple as I smile at fucking everyone. Like when I'm down the street, if someone makes eye contact with me or looks at me, I will give them a smile, and the amount of fucking times people don't smile back. You'll get like, yeah, you'll get this. You'll get like the certain person who, like, I'll always smile at people because I don't give a fuck, but like about like no one's going to change how I am if that makes sense but, um, like I will smile at some people and some people you can tell that literally just made their day like, like they smile at you, like oh, like that was really nice.
Speaker 1:And then others are fucking like who the fuck are you to be smiling at me? You know what I mean and I'm just like instantly like okay, what's up your ass.
Speaker 2:When you're in like other shops and you always say, oh, they must have had a shit day.
Speaker 1:Shit day? Yeah, because it does. Even if I have a shit day and someone smiles at me, though, I still smile back, but it does Because it's rude. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And it makes you. It's like even a flow and effect of like, if you're in a shit mood, you're it's like you're consciously wanting to make other people in a shit mood. This is really annoying.
Speaker 1:I'm just like. I can just like see it.
Speaker 2:We've got the microphone the microphone rod handle thing right in our view. Right in our view because me and m both have the same good side, so we've both got to sit like directly sat onto the camera.
Speaker 1:Both sides probably look the exact same, but it's just a thing.
Speaker 2:Everyone has it yeah, so m I got a question for you. Great, what's a small act of kindness that someone has done for you? And this could be like within the last week or like in the recent past buy me coffee.
Speaker 1:One of my clients messaged me and was like hey, babe, do you want to bring a coffee to the salon? I'm like that is so sweet. Yeah, yes, like I love that of you. Thank you so much. Like just little things like that, what were you gonna? Did you not finish the question?
Speaker 2:no, I was talking about like a big impact. Oh, a big impact?
Speaker 1:well, I think yeah this sounds silly, but I feel like the little things do make a big impact, because it just makes me feel like that is just such a fucking sweet thing to do yeah big impact, though like a small thing that made a big impact. Oh I don't really know? I don't really know, I just like small. I just like small things, not everything's small depends what we're talking about.
Speaker 2:Small things, no, I'm just joking.
Speaker 1:Oh my god um, yeah, so what was the question? Sorry, what small thing yeah, so like a small act of kindness that made a big impact, like just like say, if I was like having a fucking shit day and then someone just did something small and it just made me feel so much better yeah, well, because, like I guess you could say, small could be, you know your mom saying I love you when you're in the most like darkest yeah time of your life and that made an impact yeah, from something that could be so small, like that's what I sorry, I'm thinking about.
Speaker 1:I'm like not like a small like, like if I was in a dark place.
Speaker 2:You're like doing a chip yeah, like it could be, I guess. Um, yeah, anything like, even I don't know, I don't want to put words into my mouth. Yeah, I don't know, I'm thinking. I hate being put on the spot.
Speaker 1:I've been going fucking, since like 5 am or something. I'm fucking tired, I'm at work, um, I don't know what like what for you? I can't really think of anything off the top of my head right now, but like, yeah, I just like, even just like your small acts of kindness that like genuinely make you like feel like I love when clients message me, yeah, if you want a coffee or like even like you know, the girls at work, like ava, like I was like went out the back to mix up a color and she lined up so cute, she lined up the bowl, the fucking brush and the gloves.
Speaker 1:So I just came out I'm like, oh my god, all I had to do was squirt the fucking weight all up, grab me gloves and out I went. I was like that was really cute yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like I, just love those little like it allows your yeah day to move smoother and it does, but that doesn't take me long to grab a bowl and grab a brush and grab some fucking gloves. It doesn't take me long at all, but the fact that she just did that to get it ready for me is just cute as hell. Yeah, you know it probably takes me the same amount of time to grab those three things just off there, but like you know, it's thinking ahead, yeah, yeah what's like?
Speaker 1:like you know what about you? What's something that, a small act of kindness that had a big impact on you? Um well, you wrote the question.
Speaker 2:I would have brainstormed about it I had, um, I had quite a few, but I think for me, like a small act of kindness that made a big impact, would be, I don't know, like people having your back in a room when you're not there.
Speaker 1:A hundred percent.
Speaker 2:Like that's a small act of kindness. Can I just say that has a big impact because if someone's talking shit about you, that can fuck your reputation or your business I really want to tell a story, so much passion in this bursting at the seams.
Speaker 1:Okay, so I'm, I'm a fucking so I. When we spoke about core values, I spoke about how loyalty is a massive one for me and I am a very fucking loyal person and I have been in rooms with people I like who's been talking shit about people that I'm friends with and I will fucking have their back when they're not there and you know whatever. But then I've also been in rooms where I've been. I've, like you know, being around people who have friends who are being spoken about that aren't there, and they laugh and they don't say anything like, bro, this is your friend that these people are talking about and you're fucking laughing and then you're like, what the fuck do you say about me behind my fucking back?
Speaker 1:yeah your dog. No fucking cunt, don't, be a cunt, don't be no, but like yeah, like true it's it's true, it's like, yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2:It does have a massive impact because, like you know, fucking it's like not conforming to like what everyone is saying about that person. Like you know, everyone's got an opinion and that's okay, but it's also I know that people want to stay out of drama, but you're not getting involved in fucking drama by having your friends back.
Speaker 1:It's not like you're gonna have to fucking fight the person, yeah, all you have to say is like hey, woo up, that's my friend you're talking about. Don't speak about it like that yeah well, that's not true. That's all you have to do and, honestly, when you do do those things, people shut the fuck up like people aren't gonna argue, they're just like oh fuck I've overstepped a boundary here yeah you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:They don't like nothing bad comes from it, but you're being a better fucking person and a better friend by actually knocking it on the head and not yeah, like why jump? On that shit Fucking train. I that's one of my biggest fucking pet hates. Like I hate that shit. Kick me off shop.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't kick your mouth shut, you stick it up for your friends.
Speaker 1:Yeah, don't talk shit about people like it's just so fucking draining like I don't want to sit in a room and talk shit I'm not y'all, and I think I'd prefer to be having a productive conversation about business or something.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I think that comes down to other people's insecurities and and where their mind is up, because I know for this, like you know, like you would, as a hairdresser you know so much drama, yeah, but you're with girls that bitch every fucking hour of the day, babe, draining Clients, like you know, and you're there to support and to listen and to be an open ear.
Speaker 2:But you also realise that, like I don't know, I feel like you're. If you're not being like, how easy is it just to go along with it? Oh, yeah, she's. You know, like if someone's talking about someone like yeah, yeah, say.
Speaker 1:If, like you were talking about Like, say, if someone come in and they're like, oh my God, my fucking best friend's fucking partner doesn't want to marry anymore and the wedding's been cancelled. Oh my God darling, oh my um. Best friend's fucking partner doesn't want to marry anymore and the wedding's like oh my god, that is wild. Why did you just wake up one day and decide you didn't love her anymore?
Speaker 2:like that is literally how these conversations go, yeah and I get so invested.
Speaker 1:I'm like, oh my god, but that's different.
Speaker 2:Like yeah, no, but where I'm getting is that, like you can easily, I guess you can see an insecurity. Yeah, you know what I mean. Like if someone's, I guess, talking about something or they're bitching and whinging About other people.
Speaker 1:Honestly, I don't really have a lot of I don't really have clients that come in and bitch about other people.
Speaker 2:It's more so like, oh, my partner fucking did this and I'm like, oh yeah, fuck that guy you know what I mean like it's never really like I don't really have clients that come in and like like bitching about friends and like, but if you did um, I could see you being the type of person that would knock it on the head and what say don't speak about this person that I don't know, like that no, but like you wouldn't, I could, like you would be more.
Speaker 1:So like asking about questions and how they got there, and rather than just taking that side straight like if you didn't know, I don't know, sally I asked so many questions about people's situations yeah obviously I'm getting to know them and I'm like invested in them and I just like yeah I don't think what I was trying to say came out that way.
Speaker 2:Well, but what I was trying to say is, like insecurities, when people are bitching about insecure, about other people, other people, but it's normally their insecurities shining through.
Speaker 1:What you're trying to say is if someone came in and they're like look, how fat this person is. Yeah, like why are you in? Like I don't want to fucking hear about how fat someone is. That's fucking rude.
Speaker 2:I would never say that about somebody and you wouldn't be like oh my god, she's so fat.
Speaker 1:Oh, show me another photo that's what you're trying to say. We just wasted so much time. But that's what you're trying to say, like belittling someone else yeah, like yeah, not talking about like a specific situation, like someone's been cheated on or something like that, like that's different to someone coming to be like oh my god, have you seen this person?
Speaker 2:yeah, you know what I mean, and it's like yeah, I've been up since 3, 30 guys.
Speaker 1:Yeah we're going off on a fucking absolute tangent. That was like a lot of waste of time, but you enjoyed that segment did it yeah, it did.
Speaker 2:Okay, good anyway. So obviously the act of kindness this actually ties in really well. The act of kindness has a ripple effect most of the time, so you can inspire others to either act shitter as a person or better as a person. So if you're going to be a shit person, no, if you're going to be a good person, you're going to have kindness and you're going to spread that.
Speaker 1:You're more likely going to get that back yes, so how do you think society would change if more people focused on being kinder and more understanding? I love this question because, like I feel like so many people, if they were like, kinder to themselves and so much less judgmental on themselves, imagine how they're going to show up for everybody else like you know, I fucking hate.
Speaker 1:I'll tell you a story. So when I competed me and my friend kia and jess we're in the elevator now. This girl who shows up on social media like she's super fucking humble and she's really fucking lovely comments on people's shit, like she's such a fucking lovely person I'm not joking she got in the in the elevator and I smiled at her I'm pretty sure key did too and she fucking looked us up and down and then fucking turned her back to us and me and k just looked at each other and we're like what the fuck? I was like what is the fucking point of that? Like do you actually think that you're better than us? Because you're fucking not? Like no one's better than anyone here. Like wake the fuck up to yourself. Like there's absolutely no reason for it. Yeah, like I just don't understand it. Like, and it's literally all you're doing is trying to make us feel like shit. We don't, because we're fucking competing.
Speaker 1:We know we look good, it's fine we look like yeah, like we're confident people, but like you know, it's just like people shit, like that. It's like when you go to the gym, like at the gym I'm like one of the regular people I train at the same time every fucking day there's a few that, no matter what time of the day I go to the gym, I fucking see them there. It's weird. I'm like, do you not leave ever? But like it's like when you go to the gym and there's people that are new and they come in like I'm not going to be fucking like deaf, staring them, like who the fuck are you looking them up and down?
Speaker 1:I smile at fucking everybody.
Speaker 1:I'm such a lovely person, honestly, um, yeah you know, what I mean, like yeah, and like if people I'll always make a little conversation like, especially like the new girls, because girls are always a little bit more intimidated and, like you know, I can lift quite heavy and people probably look at me and they're like, holy fuck, like they do. Girls do look at me like that, so I always make the effort to be like hey, like you know, I'm emma, how are you kind of thing and I talk to people and like it makes such a fucking difference. The fact that I'm like doing that makes them feel so much more comfortable, because like obviously they're.
Speaker 2:They're feeling a little insecure and whatnot you're giving it a bit more of a safe space.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and, like I, wish that other people could just fucking do that, because then it would just be such a fucking better world yeah yeah, like, imagine if people were like that and like just equally like.
Speaker 2:Obviously they have their own insecurities if they're fucking walking around treating people like shit, like we were just talking about before and I think, like because I know I'm a massive introvert, so sometimes like I'll go into the gym and like you never would have thought huh, you never would have thought you're an introvert, extroverted introvert, yeah, yeah yeah, extroverted, introvert, I'm like that yeah I'm the exact same.
Speaker 1:I'm an introvert like. What about when we're fucking introvert?
Speaker 2:I'm like wait what?
Speaker 1:no, like when we did, we did the event. And like when we did the event, and like as soon as I got up there to talk, I'm literally talking to all of these people as a group, but the second I had to stand up and start speaking. I was like, oh fuck, I'm nervous.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's weird, eh yeah. Yeah, like wanting to smile and like that's just who I am sometimes. Like sometimes I have some, really, I guess, down days, yeah, like I like like super depressed, but I just don't want to be in front of people, don't want to talk to people, don't want to look at people and sometimes like you can get still mistaken as a bitch, but like we've got bad resting bitch faces, yeah, but like I'm not gonna, yeah, but you're not gonna walk in like death staring everyone no, if someone smiles at you, you're gonna smile, you still smile back, yeah.
Speaker 2:So that's what I was getting is that you don't have to be like walking around with like, yeah, I'm gonna shoot move, but I'm just like creepy, yeah, like a fucking clown, like you're gonna fucking come and like stab someone no, like a psychopath, I'd be leaving the gym, I'd be like this is fucked.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm out.
Speaker 2:But you can like some people, I guess say, if someone was to see me walk in the gym, I was in one of those, like you know, not feeling the best mood, and then they might have looked at me, smiled, but I didn't realise that they smiled and I had a resting bitch face, and then they think that I'm a judgemental. You know what I mean. So like I get, yeah, but in the grand scheme of things, it's like if you're in a like, if you're gonna suck up people, like coming back to the social media, stalking to him about it is that if you're going to like act overly friendly and like you're wanting to build a relationship.
Speaker 1:It's fake. It's. It's a relation. Yeah, you're wanting to build a relationship.
Speaker 2:It's fake, it's. It's a relationship. Yeah, you're trying to build a relationship online, but you can't have that same strategy and tools face to face.
Speaker 1:You're a fucking shit cunt, yeah literally, I didn't mean it like that, no, but like yeah, it's like if you're gonna be lovely to people on social media and you're like, oh, that's so nice, and then you see that person out in public and you fucking look at them like what the fuck? Like, what the fuck are you doing? Like don't fucking bother, being fake as fuck on socials. Yeah, I did when like you're not going to be the same person in person. Like, bitch, sit down, be humble.
Speaker 2:Like you know what I mean I had when I won my pro card. There was a girl that this is where this kind of came up. I was talking to Em. She was very like supportive online.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then I went up to her she's done quite a few shows and I went up to her and I congratulated her. She didn't place but, like you know, I was congratulating her just as you do as a, you know, when you're backstage with people, you know congratulating her just as you do as a, you know, when you're backstage with people, you know. And um, she literally I won my pro card and she literally looked at me and said thanks and walked away. And that's when I was like you fucking cunt, literally, and I won't, won't. Yeah comment. She comments on my like she hasn't.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's few, few times, but I fully pointless like why, why?
Speaker 1:that's why, why portray yourself? I just don't understand why people are going to portray themselves to be this nice person on socials and then just be this asshole.
Speaker 2:But they can't back it up In person. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Like I am the same fucking person that is sitting here on this podcast, or is like on my Instagram or whatever.
Speaker 2:I'd rather you be like a shit con on line and then really nice in person. There has been.
Speaker 1:Literally there has been that many people that I have connected with on social media that I've said, hey, two out and they're just like don't want to borrow me, but yeah, we'll still continue to talk to me on coming on my shit on social.
Speaker 2:And I'm like what the hell?
Speaker 1:Yeah, like it, weird yeah so just don't do it. Don't do this shit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's like I respect the people, it's like we want it. Like old days, yeah, like old days you would go up and shake someone's hand in person. But you know, on like facebook or whatever, you're not going out of your way to go and like people's stuff, like when you look at like even my dad and things like that. Social media is nothing like they don't. It's nothing, it's not like. Oh, did you see my post yesterday? No, it's yeah, you go and you go and introduce yourself or you know, say hi in person.
Speaker 1:Bring back the old days. I know I miss it. I know here I am trying to meet someone I don't like I. I was really when I would meet people out and now I'd never go out.
Speaker 2:I'm like, how am I supposed to? Yeah, instagram, um, well, that's a little bit off topic, but anyways. Um, we've got, send us a text message to change it. It said on the podcast description note send us a text message. And then the description. I went on it, I just deleted it out because it said it on spotify the first thing send us a text message. Oh my god, guys, send us a text message. Oh my God, guys, send us a text message. Please don't text us. We actually have fan mail, guys, so you can do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, fan mail set up and everything. Oh my God, do that I wanted to touch on when partners or friends can't be truly supportive because of their own insecurities. Yes, that's like, I think, one that so many women like males too, but a lot of women do like, I guess. Well, I know I struggled with wearing like whatever I wanted, or even getting my boobs done like there was so many things that I wasn't allowed to do because of getting more of the limelight brought to me like the hotter, not like that was really bad, but like the more I did stuff to myself, lips lashes like just making myself confident even.
Speaker 1:Like what you're talking about here is like I'm sure when you got your boobs done right when you want to get your boobs you would tell people and people like, oh, don't get your boobs done. Like you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Like there's people out there that aren't going to support, like yeah, you know what I mean, and it's just like yeah, well, my like when I, when, when I started growing up, it was like because I had like I don't know, I was like I looked like a young girl, probably until like probably three years ago, like just as I was 20, just as I got my boobs on. Like that year was like when I started to get some more injections, and it was more so like I started to have the resources to do that to make myself feel better.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And that's when, like my ex, he fucking hated it, started to call me a slut and you know, correlating he was correlating. No, it's because all the girls that he knows to have fake boobs to, he puts them in a category of and then, they've cheated on their partners and then like you put me.
Speaker 1:So now you're in that category of cheaters because you got some teeth yeah, yeah, but that's what I mean to feel good about yourself and and yeah, that's his insecurity, that's his yeah.
Speaker 2:So like that is a big one. I feel like, yeah, if, if your insecurities are coming out from whatever somebody wants to do, like that's when you really gotta fucking check yourself for sure because you're gonna ruin relationships no, that's right and that that does happen, a lot like the boob thing.
Speaker 1:That's a massive thing that a lot of like guys I feel like think yeah, don't get boozed.
Speaker 2:I like natural boobs better. And then you get tits and then they're just like it's literally, it's like I. Yeah, it was a massive wake up call for me because, like the amount of people that would say, how shit, fake tits are because they, yeah, no, and then they're all for them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I prefer natural boobs. Well, you tell you what? Come on, I fucking don't. Mine went to shit after competing, so like I'm gonna get some too. So fucking, keep your opinions to yourself. You know what practical steps can people take to be more considerate and less self-centered in their daily lives. Yeah, like that. So maybe like catching themselves on, like as you said, like putting your insecurities onto other people.
Speaker 2:Like, let's not Like think about is this a me problem or a them problem?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because half the time it's a me Like that sounds bad but half the time it's like a me problem, Like sometimes I say things to people and I'm like that was a bit of a cunt thing to do.
Speaker 2:Like, yeah, just like, just let them, if that's what they wouldn't do.
Speaker 1:That's what makes people happy. That's like a big thing. I feel like you know, sometimes when I hear people like talking, like talking shit about people or whatever, and they're like, oh, this person's doing this and like, oh, they shouldn't fucking do that, and rah, rah, rah, it's like it's not hurting. I'm like even today, like something was said and I was like, oh well, it's not hurting me. So if it makes them happy, fucking good on them. Like if it makes them happy like fucking who cares? It doesn't fucking directly affect you.
Speaker 1:So like why use your energy to, like you know, fucking yeah yeah. You know what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely, I feel like that is.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I feel like, yeah, being like self-aware of like what like of yourself, and like working on your own insecurities, and it's like, okay, if I'm having this opinion, then why you?
Speaker 2:know, yeah, look a bit deeper. Yeah, yeah, literally, and the reaction's generally not worth it, like if you're sitting there overthinking or know dwelling on something, then, unless it's like you know, they've obviously done wrong by you oh yeah disrespected you or something. Yeah, yeah, for sure, it's smart to look inside.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so like that would probably one be one thing, and to be left self-centered like that's probably like I don't know. I feel like being so much being like a giver, like giving people more like we were talking about with ivy, even like giving like stops you from like how would I do even work this word, this like being a giver, I feel like obviously it's like not a self-centered thing to do, but I feel like it. It brings you out the more that you give, the more you receive, and I feel like it just I don't know where I'm going with this it makes you a better person. I don't know. Can you answer this?
Speaker 1:I'm trying to be so tired, so yeah. So I'm saying like, yeah, to be less like tips on being like how to be left less self-centered?
Speaker 2:yeah, well, obviously that comes down to, like, if you're going to be less self-centered about like just in everyday life, is that what you mean? So, just every yeah. So yeah, as you said, giving, giving rather than taking yeah, filling other people's cup rather than always expecting yours to be filled, so like yeah like the world doesn't fucking revolve around no, so like if you're putting like yourself in other people's shoes.
Speaker 2:That's what I'm trying to say yes, I really lost it there yeah, my mind went fucking put yourself in other people's shoes, I feel like that's a good, yeah, good one.
Speaker 1:That's what one thing that I really try to do before I react to anything as well like. I am very good at seeing things from. I'm a good debater. If we want to have an argument, I'm so. I'm sorry for confrontation because, like I can put myself in your shoes, but like you also need to understand where are you coming from?
Speaker 2:yeah, yeah, which is a good thing.
Speaker 1:That's why I'm good at arguing with people, because it's like you know, I can have a conversation. I think it's really important to be self-aware and to be able to do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, it's like that self-reflection in the moment. Self-reflection in the moment, yeah, exactly um, I just wanted to touch on like my biggest pet peeve is like when people have to justify why others are doing so well or why they've done good in any kind of business.
Speaker 1:Business, yeah, people say like, oh, you're so lucky and I'm like lucky. Do you know how fucking hard I've had to work to fucking get here nights and days where I've had to work and not actually pay myself anything like brother? Luck she fucking luck, my fucking ass like yeah, 100. I totally agree. It's like they think that, oh, we just woke up and made it yeah, yeah, it's just so naughty it.
Speaker 2:Or like yeah, when people it's like yeah, it's like when you're talking good about somebody and then someone has to have the that little negative jab, yeah, it's like then, oh, they're not actually doing that. Well, yeah, I'm better than that yeah, I'll be better.
Speaker 1:Yeah, bringing people down like yeah you don't want to hear it and I think if you fuck up. I think you need to apologize yeah, no, for sure that was so random, if you fuck up.
Speaker 2:You need to apologize.
Speaker 1:No, I was gonna say about, um, being more considerate to of other people, like, like, like, yeah, don't be a cunt and be like you know.
Speaker 1:If someone's in a fucking bad mood or if someone's going through something, love that me and like me and the girls at work are so, um, like we're so like tightly sink and sink that, like you know, if someone's having a bad day, like we will literally do little things throughout the day just to make their life that little bit easier, like it's so not hard to do. That like rather like than coming in and going, oh well, she's in a fucking shit mood, so like fuck her, like be fucking considerate, yeah, you know, and just like it's really not that fucking hard, like you know, you don't have to take everything on board and like make it like a you problem, yeah like not everything's about you.
Speaker 2:That's a really powerful thing because, like when I I'm just going to drop it, but like when I work in a team environment and this isn't only one thing that I work in a team environment, but I don't want to mention it. I'm trying to do it really subtly.
Speaker 1:Anyway, so you're not bringing it to me.
Speaker 2:It's very, yeah, but it's just from the very like, from the day one, like when there was all the OGs, it was sick. Now it's like all these new people coming in, but then they all think they've got like this authority, so they'll like. If there's people that like, fuck it if they're tanning slow or something, like people, people, if people are tanning, so they'll be like they'll come around. And because, like I'm one of the faster tanners, so I bounce between like either the males or the be like they'll come around. And because, like I'm one of the faster tanners, so I bounce between like either the males or the female, and you know, people come around and be like oh, you know, this blah, blah, blah is taking so fucking slow and things like that I've had to have, you know.
Speaker 1:Conversations.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because it's a team and like we were like a big team. It's definitely definitely getting better now because the communication's improving, but it's like those new people kind of come in and yeah, it's like there's no, as you said, like it's such a powerful thing. If, like you know, if someone's having a shit time or someone is slow or they're feeling sick or they can't work as hard and fast as you, that's okay. Work as a fucking team. That's a fucking empathy. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like, and if that person's, you're gonna have day off days yeah, yeah, so being able to pick up do you want people being a fucking cunt to you?
Speaker 2:if you're like having an off day, yeah yeah, I feel like a lot of people forget about that, though they do because they're self-centered.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, just stop, please just stop it. Yeah, how do you handle situations where others are being rude or inconsiderate to you? I am really bad for treating people like so. I am so nice, but if someone fucking is fucking rude to me, I am rude back. And it's really like my, like it's my business or whatever, but like if I have someone come in and they're fucking rude, I am fucking rude, it's my business, I don't care, like.
Speaker 1:I'm not like going to have people come in and speak to me. I'm fucking any less than like as bad as that sounds. As bad as that sounds like you know, like I. Is that bad to say, should we?
Speaker 2:say no.
Speaker 1:No because I feel like people hate like like I, and then, as stupid as it sounds, they will like switch up I was just about to say that, because if you treat people the way, because they don't expect, like in a work, like I'm just saying, in a work environment yeah someone comes in and they're fucking rude to me, they don't expect me like because I'm sorry, but the customer is always right.
Speaker 1:That fucking is gone out the window, long gone. That's saying fuck it. No, it's not. They're not always right and like yeah, I have found, if they are fucking rude to me and like because some people can be fucking rude Like I will be rude back and they snap out of it If you start sucking up their ass and giving them the world.
Speaker 1:That's why they treat people the way that they do when they come into a business or something like that because, they know that if I fucking am rude and I do this and I do that, I'm going to get what I want. I'm going to get what I want. I'm going to get shit for free. I'm sorry, no, you're not. You know what I mean. And then if you don't let have those boundaries in place, even in your business or with your clients and whatnot, people are going to walk all over you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you need to have those boundaries yeah, absolutely, that's a really important one because it's so easy, as I started saying that I was like oh my god, this is sounding bad because I'm like if, if you're rude to me, I'm going to be fucking rude back, but like you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:Yeah, but it's not like you're going to be fully like flipping them a bird and telling them to fuck off?
Speaker 1:Oh no, like, get the fuck out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like you're doing it in a professional manner, professional way, but you're putting as you said.
Speaker 1:You're kind of saying like don't come here and try and make me yeah, like you know, I'm not here to be your fucking punching bag yeah, and people like oh, shit, like you know, like because you can't, you've got to have boundaries like that and like, yeah, it's just, it's not it. I just don't stand for people that treat other people like shit. I hate it. Yeah, it's the worst.
Speaker 1:We actually had, like a client come in and she was so like I don't know what it is, but like ava, our apprentice, she's fucking amazing. She's killing it at blow dry. She's helping us with everything. She's really good and we're not gonna let her do something if she's not good at it. Like I'm not gonna fucking put her on the floor and get her to help us do stuff if she's not doing up to our standard and I'm not joking. This chick fucking chucked a fucking hissy fit. It was so bad like poor ava. Like I don't know if she was embarrassed or not. She handled it really well. She just went out the back, but like everyone was just looking at each other in the salon like clients and all because of how this chick was reacting over the blow dryer ava just blow dried her hair and I'm not joking.
Speaker 1:It looked the exact fucking same as if me or amy would have done it. It was just the fact that it was ava and she was an apprentice. She wasn't happy with it. What?
Speaker 2:did? She say, she fucking.
Speaker 1:I did. I didn't want the um, the apprentice, apprentice, blow drying my hair and rah, rah, rah. Yeah, it was really bad. It was so bad, I said and I ended up jumping and I said, okay, can we just let it go, it's done, problem solved. It looked the exact same, like you know, like we ended up just curling it, but, yeah, it was really bad, and she's the only one that looked like a fucking idiot to be like, to be honest, because, like everyone else in the salon was like, oh my god, but yeah, like you've literally just put down.
Speaker 1:I've just done my hair, you've literally just put down a 16 year old girl to what make yourself feel better, and it's a fucking blow dry.
Speaker 2:It's a fucking blow dry I'm sure if it was that bad it would have been it was.
Speaker 1:But it was a bouncy blow dry. She's so good at them, yeah, and I was. I was literally just like I was gobsmacked. It was literally just because some people just don't want an apprentice to touch their hair because they're learning. Like it's just ridiculous, like how else are they supposed to fucking learn? But it was so rude and I was like don't fucking speak to my fucking staff like that, and that's the thing. You've got to have their back.
Speaker 2:Like I'm not going to fucking let them treated like she's fucking 16, no and that and that that. Like I feel like that is you know where. She will start to feel like less confident if she's slamming her confidence, yeah, and like she just walked straight out the back.
Speaker 1:Good on her. And I went straight out there I said, are you okay? And she was like, yeah, I'm fine, I'm like, don't even worry about it. Like, but I know she's fucking 16 and she's so sweet too yeah, and then, like you know, we fucking, we love ava.
Speaker 1:And then, yeah, obviously she started to feel bad, this girl, because I think she could see everyone else's reaction and obviously she started to feel bad. So then she started, like you know, kind of trying to backpedal and I was, I feel, like that's the worst thing you can do.
Speaker 1:It was so bad and I was just like, oh my god, like can you please just leave? It was just so bad. But and I was just like, oh my God, like can you please just leave. It was just so bad. But yeah, I just thought to myself, wow, like how can you be so like self-entitled, like that was fucking horrible and it made every single person in the salon fucking uncomfortable and I was like you've literally just done that For what?
Speaker 1:It's a fucking blow dryer, like. And then, hey, like amy comes over and like does the same thing. It looks the exact same. Oh, it's great, looks the exact fucking same. But, all right, have a good day. Has she come back? No, hopefully, fucking she doesn't, being like, I've built my business to be what I want it to be. I don't want people like that coming in. I don't want your money.
Speaker 2:No. That's like with coaching that sounds terrible.
Speaker 1:Like we have such a fucking great business structure and like even my clients today, like two of them, literally like fuck, you're a magician Em. Like, oh, I don't give a fuck what you do, I just trust you. Like these comments is what I love and then at the end they're like, fuck, yeah, I look so good. Or they're like loving Ava, or like you know, they're just like they become a part of the business and a part of it and they just love it and like this is what I've created a space for everyone. I don't want someone coming in and making everyone, including my other clients, feeling uncomfortable, like worst.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was the worst. I used to have a client that used to start drama a lot between the group, like with all my clients, and it was a lot of. It was coming from childhood traumas where she was always a yeah, like a black sheep of the fam and then like her sister and stuff. I guess like her sister and stuff, I guess yeah, but she she was like I've never actually dealt because obviously, me being just the coach, everyone get together, we're all catching up for a photo shoot or things like that, but then as soon as that petty drama starts to come in between a bunch of girls like, I felt it was very hard to handle and I was trying to pinpoint what was going on because I was told as a coach that I'm leaving people out and I'm choosing favourites and I'm like, but that wasn't the case at all.
Speaker 2:It wasn't the case. And when I looked at things and then I started to open up the can of worms, I'm like, oh, so it's actually coming from.
Speaker 1:We could have just told you yeah, you know what I'm talking about looking at me. At first you're just looking at the camera. I'm like is she not looking at me?
Speaker 2:because I'm just sitting here with a big smirk on my face like yep, don't eat the cake but yeah, and it is something that you just like, as we said at the start, you've got to kind of check yourself. But if you're the person like for my circumstance, when I'm yeah, I'm trying to, you know, manage a group where I'm trying to keep everyone happy, if there's that one person like I could have snapped and been like that's not the fucking case. You know x, y and z. But I dug deeper into her own insecurities and then I was like, okay, that is a you problem, like because I, I was taking on board because I was in bed.
Speaker 1:That's not your. That's not your problem.
Speaker 2:You're not leaving anyone out I was in bed for like two days. This is one of the photo shoots that we did um, yeah, I was in bed for two days because I was like I felt so I was depressed. Yeah, because I felt like I I wanted like, obviously, you know, be a leader and be inspiring, inspiring to to my girls, and I feel like it doesn't matter if it's one or it's 10 or it's 40, if, if I've upset one, it fucking kills me. You know what I mean. So, like, and then when I, as I said, when I started to dig deeper into it, I was like Girl your value doesn't decrease on the opinion of others.
Speaker 2:No, it doesn't, but so you should not have let that happen.
Speaker 1:No, no but that's a learning curve too and it's really hard to manage a big group of women. It's easy having like us three because it's like we can just figure it all out together. Yeah, but it was just yeah. I know that situation was just like draining god. It was like fuck me. You couldn't even look at jess without fucking being picked the favorite. Oh my god, she likes me more, like I'm just fucking showing up and being myself.
Speaker 2:She didn't share my story. I've done something.
Speaker 1:Well, you always share my story. If you didn't, I'd probably be like what have I done?
Speaker 2:No, that wasn't a scenario, I was joking.
Speaker 1:That was my ex-boyfriend.
Speaker 2:Fuck that guy Did you see my photo. Did you like it?
Speaker 1:Why didn't you comment on my photo? It's like when you yeah, when you just post something for that one specific person and everyone else. There's all these random guides like you're so beautiful, you're like fuck off, and that one person just isn't there. And you're like for fuck's sake. And they're just like should I just share it to them?
Speaker 2:yeah, just tag them next time oh no.
Speaker 1:Um, how do you think social media and pop culture has influenced people's behavior towards each other?
Speaker 2:I reckon it's a dog eat dog.
Speaker 1:World same I feel like people back in the day used to be so much more fucking humble and like, because everyone's so like look at me, look what I've got. Like blah, blah, blah. And yeah, everyone's trying to compete with each other on social media, as bad as that sounds, but like everyone compares with each other, it's like.
Speaker 1:So then you know, comparison is a thief of joy, yeah, that is my favorite quote yeah, and like you, like, and that's the thing people will compare and compare and compare. Do you know how many fucking people I talk to because? And they're like oh, my biggest thing is that I just fucking compare myself to others, like why I don't care what they're doing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, I agree, it's a dog eat dog world out there and like, as we were saying before, like you know, I just you know, sometimes some, with some people, like it can be such a cool thing because, like there's been people that people that like when I competed, that I connected with on socials, Like.
Speaker 1:Tay, she's fucking lovely and like I fucking mean her, we're helping each other in the change rooms and whatever. And like she run her pro card at the end of last year, I think it was, or June or whatever and like I still talk to her all the time Like you know, and she's genuinely that person on social media is what she is, yeah, in person.
Speaker 1:And like you know, it's like shit, like that, where it's like, oh, that's really nice, but more often, more often than it's the opposite way it's so shit and so sad because social media could be used as such a big fucking platform, yeah, platform to introvert, introvert, um, yeah, like such a positive tool to be able to like uplift people and whatever, but yeah, it's just like. I mean, people do use it for that, but yeah, it's just, it can just be such a yeah like, I feel like, for example, like I like even posting photos.
Speaker 1:I'll be like, oh, my fucking face looks weird, but it doesn't. But you know, like you just want to show up the best of the best, it's like why can't we just show up and be that little bit more vulnerable?
Speaker 2:yeah, I feel like social media. In my opinion it's created like a, a divide between like how do I say it? Like the people that I guess they are more so really confident and don't give a fuck, which is like I love that at like those attributes, but then the people that are very like don't want to be seen yeah so it's like, really, I guess, split those two, two different.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know personalities or whatever. So then the people that are like you know, wanting to want the clout, there's more, there's less humble people yeah, I don't know if I'm saying, I'm trying to say it in like a really they're trying to perceive themselves to be this certain way and be like this, like so, like I'll be talking about before, about his business idea influences going to a jet plane?
Speaker 1:it's not even. It's just in a warehouse yeah, and it's.
Speaker 2:It looks like a plane and there's influence in there dollar idea.
Speaker 1:He's not gonna be happy.
Speaker 2:Sorry, ivy, I've copyrighted it, it's okay but you know what I mean. Like that's how superficial and stuff this world is. So like those people that are, I guess, yeah, more like they love the clout, they love the attention, blah, blah, it can get to their head, to their head, and then that creates fuckwits and cunts. You know what I mean for sure fuckwits and cunts. Yes, it does yeah, because it's like it's an egotistic thing here's a tip.
Speaker 1:This is what I did, actually in covid. I literally went through my entire fucking following and unfollowed every single fucking person that made me feel like shit. Not made me feel like shit, but just people that I look at and I'm like like, keep all the people that motivate you and whatnot like, rather than, like you know, flicking, just being like, oh, like, if you're comparing yourself to people or whatever, like that is one of the best things you can do. Honestly, I did a massive one at this time last year.
Speaker 1:Or if someone pops up and I'm like, oh, I'm sick of seeing their shit, then just like get rid of them because it's just not. It's not benefiting me in any way. Yeah.
Speaker 2:You, I agree that's probably like the most powerful thing when it comes to social media, it's not like. It's like anything If you, even you, know the music. You listen to, what you read, what you're surrounding yourself with.
Speaker 1:That's subconsciously, you know what you're thinking about.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, if you're always looking at girls that make you feel like, oh, less of, or lacking, yeah, like oh I wish I like if you're like that, but if you feel like you're lacking, then yeah you. That's again. Look deep and and why you're feeling like that reflect. Yeah, yeah because that is a you problem, but get rid of it. So then, yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 1:So then it doesn't make you feel bad yeah because then that that like the flip side of that for me personally, like I follow girls, I'm like fuck, I want her physique, like it's motivating, yes, but then there will be people who are like they feel shit because they're like why don't I look like that?
Speaker 2:or why blah, blah, blah, blah yeah, it's a lack of, and then that's when you're diving deep into that, but like tying it back into this episode. You don't have to be a cunt and go and talk shit about that person that you're.
Speaker 1:That's right exactly. I think too. Like, don't be a cunt to your fucking damn self. Like, yeah, show yourself all that stuff, kindness and empathy and all that sort of stuff.
Speaker 1:Like yeah, be your own motherfucking best friend yeah, literally, because, like you know, I mean I'm sure no one listening to this is a cunt. We're not talking directly to these people, but we're just, like you know, we're just like putting out there like situations that obviously we've had, but like yeah, like um, oh fuck, I've done it again you know what I actually had a client, the other day tell me she was like fuck, I love your podcast.
Speaker 2:She's, she goes. Do you know what it reminds me of? Because I said that we need a bit, we need a bit more practice, blah, blah. I was like trying to play down down. Yeah, I know it's fucking good. I was like, yeah, yeah, thank you no but she's like. It just reminds me of like two chicks sitting around table having a drink and a yarn imagine if we had alcohol, I was literally.
Speaker 1:No, I'm joking oh my god, next time we stop in the bottle. Oh, that would be fucking chaotic as m comes back from a Europe holiday. We're getting unbended oh bro, we are not doing that. No, no, no. But yeah, I'll have some stories to tell.
Speaker 2:So, like, maybe we should have a drink, huh, when I get back. Yeah, do a few eppies, yeah.